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Fighting Fear

October 30, 2014

With Halloween just 2 days away, it’s the perfect time to address something we all face in one way or another – FEAR

You are not alone:

Everyone fears something, be it spiders or ghosts, failure or abandonment, or just the everyday interactions with our fellow humankind. We deal with these fears through avoidance, manipulation and isolation and the consequences can be dire. In allowing our fears to control how we move about in the world we are sacrificing an opportunity to grow and become stronger, and ultimately we cheat ourselves out of the peace and joy-filled existence that we deserve.

Fear Is Useful:

Fear is the self’s safety mechanism. A healthy dose of mild fear will keep you from running out into traffic or hopping into a stranger’s car, so the trick is to keep your fear in check. It’s important to take the time to identify your fears, including the driving force behind them, and objectively evaluate their value and validity. If you find that your fear is debilitating, or even limiting it’s time to delve deeper into the issue.

Define Your Fears:

Defining your fear isn’t easy. Often times our fears stems from something far deeper than the trigger. For example a fear triggered by spiders doesn’t just mean “spiders are icky, so I am afraid of them”. I know that my own personal fear of spiders comes from the unknown. It’s not the spider that I can see sitting still on the wall which scares me, it’s the one that scurries under the blanket I am snuggled up underneath. Not knowing where they are, or where they are going is what gets me. Conveniently, this is the same base fear that carries through my entire life – Will I know anyone at the event? What if I say something stupid? What if I blush? What if I have nothing to say? What if… What if… What if…?

Put It Into Perspective:

Putting it into perspective is crucial! Is there any validity to your fear? How much? Once you can identify a healthy level to maintain, getting yourself there is as easy as breathing through it.

Practice Coping (and yes, it takes practice!):

When you start to feel your fear kick in, stop. Stop whatever you’re doing and pay close attention to how you feel, how the fear manifests in your body. Breathe deeply to control that fear. Inhale slowly through the nose imagining that the lungs are a magnet, attracting all the darkness and negativity in your body, and visualize a dark cloud of fear growing in your chest. Then part your lips and slowly exhale. Using the abdominal muscles to control the exhalation, imagine that cloud of darkness slowly being forced from the body, out the mouth. Watch your dark cloud diminish in size with each breath until there is no more darkness to exhale.

Fill Yourself With Love!:

Now that you have cleared all that fear out of the body, it is important to fill that new open space with some positivity. Keeping you breathing strong and steady, this time visualizing a soft white light entering the nostrils with each in hale and watching it gather in the lungs. Then as you exhale, through the nostrils, imagine that soft light running through all the veins of your body, illuminating all of your limbs. Keep breathing more and more light into your body until you feel like you are glowing. Allow yourself to smile and bask here in this newfound joy.

 

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